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| Oakland Rose Garden |
Skipping ahead some years, I was called upon to be Brad’s Best Man, and as such, was responsible for the logistics of a large outdoor wedding at the Oakland Rose Gardens. Since I'm in Maine, Jory stepped up as my right hand and did the local stuff that I couldn't handle directly. Once I got there, the biggest problem was getting a large number of folding chairs and such, from the park entrance to the wedding site, some distance away. I talked to the parks department. Brad talked to the parks department. I talked to the parks director. There was no way they could authorize or provide a parks employee to remove the vehicle barriers on a Saturday. Within minutes of our arrival on site, there was a parks employee taking down the barriers. I still don't know how Jory did it! He just gave me his big grin.
When we heard about Jory’s accident, my daughter and I held each other tightly and sobbed. Her 13 year old son, Brandon, was distressed by our grief and wanted to know about this man we loved so deeply. We told him our stories and over the days and weeks, he read all the stories from around the world on Facebook.
A little about Brandon: he has ADHD, ADD, ODD, and Anxiety Disorder. He has been drumming since he was two. He's had difficulty with friendships and at school. He’s a very bright kid, often friendly and kind, but alternating between disruptive behavior and being withdrawn into his own world. At his middle school, 90% of the students are in the music program, so there is vicious competition for spots in the ensembles... especially so for drum line. None are as competitive as Brandon, but he never made it.
A few months ago we started noticing some changes.
He started becoming social and popular with the other kids. He made sure the wallflowers were always included in social activities. He was generously coaching the other drummers on difficult sections. Now, this fall, he will be lead drummer for the jazz band and show choir.
The changes were dramatic!
I asked him what had happened.
He had started asking himself, "What would Jory do?"
With love,
Chad
I had tears in my eyes, but I immediately wrote a response.
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| Jory in Troy Band |
Please share with Brandon that Jory also grew up having ADHD, juvenile epilepsy, and tons of allergies to both foods, animals, and airborne pollen. In school, he thought that everyone was his friend, but often he was not included in birthday parties or after school activities. He began his journey with music when he was 3 years old when he discovered tubas at Disneyland. He started taking piano lessons at 4, but quit at 8, when he fell in love with guitars and taught himself to play. In school he began playing the trombone and was in the Jr. High and High school bands. He decided that he wanted to be in the drum line in 10th grade. He could out-drum all the experienced kids, but was not allowed to play drums because he hadn't paid his "dues." (He had an opportunity to spend the summer in Israel instead of marching on the football field.)
Jory always spent his time focusing on the good, the positive, and what was fun. He became frustrated often and shared his frustrations loudly, but then went on his way with a smile or a laugh. He created his own path through life and encouraged others to do the same. He always paid attention to details and was sensitive to the feelings of others, always finding time and ways to help others. In Fairfax, he was known to often say, "That was good, now let's go on," which is going to be inscribed on a plaque affixed to a beautiful redwood bench, which the City Council is dedicating at the city park in Jory's memory. We are told that Jory truly changed the way people thought and acted in Fairfax and that the residents often ask themselves "WWJD? What would Jory do?" when struggling with a problem or decision.
It sounds like Brandon is an amazing young man with an awesome future ahead of him. Like Jory, he will travel a path that is unique to him and he will find success in life because he has a good heart and works hard to do his best despite labels or obstacles. I'd love to follow Brandon’s journey. If he would like to read more about Jory, he is welcome to enjoy my stories at JoryPrumFreeSpirit.blogspot.com
All the best,
Jory's Mom
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| Jory's Bench in Fairfax, California |
For his birthday this year, in Jory's memory and to continue his legacy, over 200 of his friends from around the world, reached out to others with acts of random kindness. We continue to be amazed that Jory is still touching those he never knew.
COMMENTS:
Click on Jorysmother@gmail.com to send comments.
Molly Presser
WWJD? He would be very proud of the stories that his Mom writes about him. He continues to touch everyone who reads about him through your writing.
Donna Judd
This was beautiful, Leslye, both boys stories. Thanks for sharing!
Barbara Talento
As always a delightful story.
WWJD? He would be very proud of the stories that his Mom writes about him. He continues to touch everyone who reads about him through your writing.
Donna Judd
This was beautiful, Leslye, both boys stories. Thanks for sharing!
Barbara Talento
As always a delightful story.
Cynthia Lewis
This is a beautiful story, thank you.
Judy Sowell
Another touching, great story.
Ruth May Segriest
I read with passion the latest story about Jory whom I never knew but heard about when he was young. I admire your son Jory and admire you for keeping his memory alive so vividly through your blog. Keep up inspiring others through your blog!
Davina Askin
How special to get this on Oscar Sunday.
Penni Zelinkoff
Thank you for sharing lovely story with a major impact!! We don't always know when we or someone we know makes a difference, it's nice when we do!!
Brian Novak
Loved your new piece about Jory. What a neat man he was!
Phyllis Hart
I just finished reading your latest blog. It was a very touching story. Jory has affected so many lives, I know you are very proud of his accomplishments.
Heather Morales
I went to Troy with Jory and was on the Colorguard and then I played clarinet in the band our senior year. While I wasn’t very close with Jory after we graduated, I did try to keep up with what was going on with everyone we graduated with and then re-connected through facebook. The last time we talked (via Facebook messenger), he had given me a hard time about not having gone to our high school reunion because was scared I wouldn’t know anyone and he told me to get over myself and get out and talk to new people. And also he told me I was dumb not to come hang out with him when he was in Fullerton. As I am sure you’ve heard countless times, Jory made an impression on everyone he met but as we re-connected, he was someone I could talk music and sound with and I would enjoy those talks.
Photo Credit: City of Oakland
© Leslye J. Prum 2017 All rights reserved.
